The gift-giving season has been in full swing for a while, but there’s still time to grab some amazing gifts for the people you love. Of course, it’s easy to shop for Magic players – just pick up a Theros holiday gift box (which is perfect for holding all of your sleeved-up EDH decks) or some boosters!
But what about presents for all of those non-Magic players in your family? I know you don’t want to take the easy road again this year and cop-out with a stack of lottery tickets and gift cards. And you certainly don’t want those post-holiday regrets for the gifts ungiven.
Never fear, the Bad Magic Player’s Holiday Gift Guide is here! Below I’ve listed some easy gift ideas to meet all your present-shopping needs.
Show your father how much you care by giving him a gift inspired by the Father of Magic – with a bow tie like those commonly worn by Magic creator Richard Garfield!
The Internet is full of sweet bow ties, but to match the First Magician, it’s gotta have polka dots. Check out this classic “School House Polka” style from Beau Ties of Vermont:
Your Dad may not have invented your favorite card game, but with a bow tie, he’ll be as fashionable as the game-design king!
If you grew up in a traditional household, your mom is likely getting ready to prepare a fantastic holiday meal for your family to be eaten on an antique rich-mahogany dining table. Give her something epic to cover that old thing with by picking up an oversized playmat, and make the holiday dinner a bit more magical for everyone.
These 8-by-2 feet cloth pieces of art will make your mother beam with pride as the family shares in the feasting festivities. Who wouldn’t want a giant angel bearing all she has to offer as a centerpiece? It will instantly be the best gift ever given in the history of the world, I guarantee it.
You can find these on eBay, but they’re going fast!
Girls love jewelry, and I bet your sister is no different. Don’t give her some random diamond or jewel-encrusted piece of metal, though. Your sister, whom you probably picked on in the years growing up together (or the other way around), deserves something of real quality.
Give her a handmade laser-cut pendant necklace featuring her favorite mana symbol from LicketyCut:
Since you grew up with her, you probably know what color of the pie to which she’s most attuned. Animal lover? Grab that forest pendant! Fiery temper? Mountain red it is! Whichever pendant you pick, you can’t go wrong with some quality handmade Magic jewelry.
I bet this sounds familiar: you’re sorting through your Magic card collection to find that you’re missing a few of your favorite cards. Behind you is the sound of cards smacking together aggressively, and you turn to find your brother gnashing your prized possessions into pulp.
The holidays are all about peace on earth, so give yourself some peace of mind by giving your brother a present that will get him away from your Magic cards forever – a collectible game that ISN’T Magic!
Make sure it’s something that takes significant amounts of effort and time, so your brother will be sufficiently distracted, thereby maximizing the Magic protection. I recommend Warhammer 40k, which requires assembling and painting more than 20 tiny plastic units before a player can start learning the rules of the game!
Games Workshop has a great starter set you can pick up at a great discount! But don’t be tempted to buy it for yourself – it may look shiny and cool, but it’s not Magic, and you’ll hate it.
For the Significant Other:
The holidays are a great time to make up with your significant other for the fights and skirmishes you’ve had over the huge amount of time and money you spend playing Magic. Sure, you could arrange for a nice vacation or buy a really fancy gift for him or her, but that’s not going to fix the issue at the core: your significant other is addicted to bothering you about your Magic habits.
It’s time you tried to help him or her get over it. To show your love and support in his or her fight against the addiction, give your significant other the gift of a self-help book!
Addiction & Recovery for Dummies is perfect to aid your significant other in realizing that it’s okay that you spend hundreds of dollars a month on Magic Online, and he or she should be happy that you’re engaged in such a wonderful social hobby 15 to 20 hours a week.
For those of you who are married, perhaps you need a different gift to fit your situation. Sometimes your spouse’s addiction to nagging you about your Magic habit is too fierce to fix. In that case, you might need a different self-help book: Divorce for Dummies!
Regardless of which book fits your gift-giving needs, it’s sure to put the Planeswalker Spark back in your relationship!
Tea mugs and kettles are overdone gifts for grandparents. Change it up this year by giving Grandma something to fill up last year’s presents. No, no, I’m not saying you should buy your grandmother liquor, although that would make for a very interesting Christmas party….hmm…
I’m talking about Tea! Order a few of the unique homemade tea blends from Adagio Teas. Try the Wildspeaker blend with a hint of hazelnut, or the Firebrand mix for a cider-inspired chai. Better yet, get Grandma a tin of Architect, which swirls together the flavors of blueberry, peppermint, and lemon.
You can get them in two variations: a 3-ounce pouch or a 6-ounce tin. Aside from holding more tea, the tin is perfect for your grandmother to keep together all her Magic counters and dice!
Finally, we come to a gift for the grand patriarch of the family. Grandpa still loves playing games, and I bet you could teach him how to play Magic. But his eyes have gone bad in his old age, so he’ll need a little help to see how much loyalty Jace is up to, or to keep track of how many poison counters he’s dealt you.
Duluth Trading Co. has the perfect gift for Grandpa: giant six-sided dice!
Grandpa will have no problem seeing if he’s won the high-roll with these oversized dice! And when you’re done with the Magic match, the dice make for an exciting game of Craps out in the backyard.
You can also get extra-large 20-sided dice to make Grandpa’s life-total tracking a bit easier.
Hopefully you found some inspiration from these gift ideas and are ready to finish that holiday shopping you’ve put off until the last minute.
I wish you the best of luck wrapping your gifts. That’s the part of Christmas I dread…stupid tape. Happy Holidays!